Past life songs (2): Ascension.

Death and reincarnationists. It is not the first time I write about this, as death is always in my mind. Lately, it has become more present. Maybe the reason is I am getting old, and those I love even older. In this life I have been fortunate enough to lose only a young kitty, event that was quite painful to me and showed me what I was capable of doing for “just an animal”, but the mourning was short. When my grandparents died I was too small to know what all the fuss was about. And now, at 40, I have known closed deaths of relatives, but not close enough to make me cry. Or maybe all those defenses I built are being helpful now? “Don’t love anyone too much, because one day they will be gone, and you will die with them”. At least, that is what happened to me in WWII, though before that I had already lived other losses that broke my heart in a way I only can imagine today. But time keeps passing, inexorable. And death is getting closer.

One thing I have come to realize through remembering past lives. You become used to talk about death, you lose some of the fear of it, as you are certain death is not the end. But anyway death keeps being an annoyance. Like I said in an conversation not long ago, death is like a visit to the dentist: necessary, but always fearful because you don’t know what to expect, what it will be like this time, if you will be able to accept it and carry on with no unresolved issues. You can be more or less brave when facing your own or others’ death, but you eventually have to yield. There is no other way. And yielding is never easy. Our survival instincts make us fight, make us afraid of the end, of the dissolution of our ego, of forgetfulness. Whether we want it or not, death always brings some kind of suffering to ourselves or the ones we love. It makes us angry, sad, weak, we feel helpless and naked in front of death. The worst of it all is most of us are not prepared to face it. This is one of the reasons I am most thankful for being a reincarnationist: I know how I died in a few past lives, I know it is not that bad... at least when it is finally over.

And this is why I love so much this song by Arena called “Ascension”. I want it to sound (LOUDLY) in my cremation. There are so many past life feelings behind this song. However, it is not related to specific past life events, as it depicts the moment right after death. My memories of that kind are in no way similar to what the song says. I have never seen myself “ascending”. But I have felt the liberation, the end of the suffering, the departure. One chapter is over, let’s write the next. For a while, no more fear, no more judgment, no more rage, no more sadness. It is hard to leave behind your body, your being, your life, but once it’s done, it’s done (unless you want to become a ghost). And though I have felt that same detachment in some of my OBE’s, when you’re back in your body you seem to forget this physical life is what it is: not even a chapter, just a short line in the nearly eternal book of your spiritual life, the real one. But you forget and then death looks terrible again. I guess that's part of being human, and no one said being human is easy.

Rising up: you thought it was the end, and it is just a new beginning. 

ASCENSION

I feel vindicated

looking back on what I’ve done

Not so complicated 

when moments meet as one

Are you ready to part the veil?

And write a new beginning to this tale

Rising up

I see creation from the sky

I’m learning to fly 

Rising up

I see creation from the sky

This freedom is mine

Standing on the mountain

The olive leaf in hand

Drinking at that fountain

so that I might understand

Are you ready to start once more?

With no idea of what’s in store

Are you ready to part the veil?

And write a new beginning to this tale?

Rising up 

I see creation from the sky

I’m learning to fly

Rising up

I see creation from the sky

This freedom is mine 

Rising up

I see creation from the stars

We’ve travelled so far

Rising up

I see creation from the stars

We’ve travelled so far

Rising up